Dr. Ora Golan in a conversation about borders - Ora Golan

Hello Dr. Ora Golan, an expert in neutralizing emotional barriers from the Ora Golan Center, today we will talk about setting boundaries. Is the intention to set boundaries especially towards small children?

Setting boundaries is not necessarily in front of small children but in front of everyone you face; Family, friends, co-workers, etc.

* Example: Mira is 60 years old, a teacher who retired and waited for this period in her life to fulfill old dreams and live her life happily. She decided that it was enough for her to serve the five wonderful ones – her four grown children and her husband. She is at home, she really loves her family – her husband, her four children, grandchildren, brides and grooms but she feels they take her for granted; If she expresses her desire to go to some class her husband will always make one stinging remark or another, the children take her car without consulting and / or informing her. It is understandable to everyone that her grandchildren can be landed without regard to her plans and desires. Mira of course bears the burden of all housework; She is the one who washes, cooks, makes the dishes and serves them all.

When Mira came to us I asked her what she wanted to get out of the treatment. Her unequivocal answer was: “I love my family very much and want to have good relations with them, but I want them to treat me with respect, not to take me for granted, to consider my plans and desires. I want to go learn, develop, make new connections. There are lots of interesting areas. “Me and I was waiting to retire just to reach out to them … and I have one dream – to learn to play golf even though it is expensive and far from where I live.”

Mira did the treatment to neutralize emotional barriers, a short and focused treatment with no conversations and no instructions. During the treatment we used muscle resistance, text, gentle touch and imaging. At the end of the treatment, Mira told us that she had undergone a 180-degree change; All of a sudden the kids are considerate, respecting her plans and desires, asking if it is possible to bring the grandchildren, asking if it is possible to help. Mira herself has stopped paying attention to what is being said to her and / or about her, she knows what she wants and she moves on. The highlight was when she signed up for a golf class and then her husband asked her, “Can I join you for a class?”.

* How did the children react when she suddenly started setting boundaries?

At first there was a kind of wonder, they were used to another mother … submissive, obedient, put everyone before her. Because the change came from a place of security and because Guard did not apologize and feel no guilt, the children were simply reset immediately. The upheaval was not only with her, although she / she was ready to “go into battle”

* How do you deal with setting boundaries for young children?

Setting boundaries for young children is a very important and necessary thing and parents must internalize and understand that setting boundaries for their young children, whether it is going to bed, showering, stopping being at the computer and / or television is necessary to ensure them a calmer and better adult future; Children who did not set boundaries in childhood will grow up to be adults with difficulties, adults for whom everything is obvious, will find it difficult to reject gratifications and they will want everything to happen “here and now” they will be much poorer than children who grew up with clear boundaries. Address the environment and not just their immediate needs.

So at the end of the day, saving his tribe hates us.